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Today seems to be one of those days dedicated to remembering, to telling stories, to reflecting on the movement and changes of life over the last 5 years.
I often wonder how we, as Americans, got here: beginning to number the changes of our lives from that warm September morning 5 years ago. Is it because it seemed so earth shattering at the time, we feel like time itself shifted? Is it because we have lost so many (not just in the attacks but in the wars that have followed) and we cannot imagine our lives continuing without these souls?
Maybe it is because today marks the moment that we became like everyone else in the world. It marks the moment when we ceased to be untouchable and all of our sins (made by Republican and Democratic leaders alike) came crashing down upon us, with a rage so blinding…it burned away who we were. It demolished any notion we had that we were immune and better-than and indestructible.
Today marks the moment we became mortal…
I wholeheartedly acknowledge the importance of today. Like everyone else cognizant in the world that morning, I can tell you what I was doing (driving to class), what I was thinking (initially that it was a radio hoax, and later I just felt drained), and what I did for the rest of that day (wandered around campus in a daze, I went home that night and sat in the living room of the apartment I shared with Melch, we ate pizza, we waited for news of Meghan’s…cousin maybe?, we watched the news for hours, we did not speak). I realize that this is the event I will tell my children about, like JFK’s death with my parents (or with MY parents, the Kent State protester murders), when they pick up their history books in elementary school. I am aware that this day marks more than a tragedy but a shifting of consciousness for our society, not just the American people but worldwide. I know many many people who became politically energized that day, who became socially aware; who became charitable beyond what they thought they were capable of…September 11th will always be seared in our brains.
But I did not weep that day…not for many hours, maybe not even until the next day. It was too much, too big to comprehend. It was to far away, and my family was here, safe, still anticipating the movement of life to come. While I have been changed over the last 5 years…9/11 was just another change, another movement in my life. A terrifying one…but one more nonetheless…
In the last 5 years, I have lived overseas, I have cared for an ailing relative, I have gotten married, I have protested a war, I have lost my last remaining grandparents within months of each other, I have watched the loves of my life be demolished in a car accident, I have turned 21, I have watched my best friend leave for a war zone, I have been on the brink of divorce, I have moved 6 times.
It is THESE gripping, heartbreaking, astonishing events that have comprised the changes in my life over the last 5 years. The events of that day 5 years ago were only part of my story…they are part of your story too…
On days like today, when we sit and tally up our lives, I am struck by the thought that the opportunity for change, for movement and growth is present every day. Every morning, September or February, summer or spring, we are faced with the opportunity to be an active participant in our fate. We are constantly afforded opportunities to take risks and grow as people.
It has taken me years of therapy to come to this conclusion folks…years.
the bottom line is this:
We do not need a catastrophic event to remind us how fluid we are, how strong and fascinating.
We need merely look in the mirror….and seize every opportunity we can.
Sight I would like to see before I die:
Someone proposing to their significant other utilizing King Floyd’s “Groove Me Baby” in the most magnificent karaoke proposal ever.
